Find it Under a Rock if You Have to

August 2022

I’m really lucky. However, I would understand if you were inclined to disagree based on some of the life events detailed in these writings. Hear me out though. I’m a naturally positive, happy person that manages to find at least a modicum of joy in damn near any situation. That same brain chemistry has prevented me from ever experiencing prolonged bouts of depression, anxiety, etc, throughout my life and has proven invaluable when it comes to coping with grief.

I also recognize some resilience and a metric shit ton of love and support from friends and family have also helped to save my bacon throughout the years. Combined, those are some seriously effective tools that not everybody has access to, which I’m extremely thankful for. Like I said - really lucky.

And whether it’s the way the synapses in my head fire off or learned self-preservation mechanisms, I strive to find some comfort, happiness, and or peace, in the here and now to the degree that I am able. No matter the situation.

Granted, that’s proven to be a little tougher given my current state of affairs, but I think it’s of critical importance. Otherwise, I could fall into that trap of hopefully yet hopelessly clamoring for what’s next and the potential promise that happiness may be tied to a new set of circumstances, something, or someone else down the line. Because with regard to true happiness, I feel like “next” means next to nothing if I’m unable to find it in the present.